Comparison: The Thief of Joy

Ah, social media. Where would we be without its endless stream of instant gratification and your weird uncle who still cannot take a profile picture right? Beneath the veneer of memes and trendy recipes, there is a dark truth looming.

Do not get me wrong. Social media is a very valuable tool. It keeps us informed and connected in a world where information flows faster than you can blink. I cannot think of any other way we could keep up with it. Almost everyone is on some form of social media. Herein lies the problem.

Peer pressure. In the past, it meant being pressured into some bad influence by your peers. These days it means something entirely different.

Look at that — your friend Brandon just got a job offer from that huge, successful corporation everyone knows. You should feel proud of Brandon and the hard work he has put in to get there. Instead, you are just a burning pit of jealousy and feelings of inadequacy. And what’s this? Shay made better grades than you did this semester. Why are you such a failure?

The peer pressure of today manifests differently as you can see. Social media is a giant flashing billboard of your peers’ achievements. You cannot help but compare yourself and it seems you are never good enough.

Let us get to the root of the problem. It is not them. It is you. You are basing your happiness on the success of others. People tend to judge themselves more than anyone else ever will. Therefore, you will always fall short.

You are on your own path. All that matters is that you walk it. Nobody else is on that path. Take it day by day. Try to do better than you did the day before. The only person you should be comparing yourself to is the past you. If you are doing better than you have done before, that is what really matters.

By Danny Holland - Danny is a senior public relations and advertising major and the Communications Intern for the Division of Student Affairs at The University of Southern Mississippi.

Note-Taking: The 411

Taking notes is easy—or is it? If you’re like me it just might be the hardest part of the whole learning process. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Here’s some tips to help you power through that three hour lecture.

Do the assigned reading before class. That’s right. I said it. Your professor isn’t the only one who’s going to nag you about this. If you’re at least somewhat familiar with the material before the lecture, you’ll be much more likely to remember it. What’s more, you’ll have a better idea of which topics to best focus on and which topics require less of your time.

Fake it until you make it. Maybe the course you’re taking isn’t exactly up your alley. Maybe you’re an advertising major taking a theatre class to fill your schedule for scholarship requirements. If you go into the lecture with a bad attitude you’re going to come out with bad notes. Bad notes lead to a bad grade. A positive attitude will go a long way towards a positive outcome.

Prepare better. Runaway pencils seem to be quite a problem these days. Before you head out make sure you have everything you need to be successful. This includes your textbook. Sure, it might weigh 1,000 pounds—but that’s just the wealth of knowledge it contains. You don’t want to be the guy or gal who has to share a textbook with a neighbor. That’s just bad form.

Overall, it comes down to you. Note-taking isn’t the hardest thing in the world but it isn’t the easiest either. The effort you put into your notes has a huge impact on your grade.

Remember: Bad notes sink boats.

By Danny Holland - Danny is a senior public relations and advertising major and the Communications Intern for the Division of Student Affairs at The University of Southern Mississippi.

The Dreaded Zoom Meeting

We’ve all been there -- You’re 30 minutes into a Zoom meeting and more than half the class has their cameras off. Then you have somebody that forgot to mute their microphone – so there’s this odd buzzing noise cutting through your professor’s voice as he tries to pose a question. The deafening silence pierces your ears as both you and your professor stare into the rectangle-shaped void. Nobody answers.

Let’s be honest, the situation we find ourselves in now isn’t exactly comfortable but it’s the safest and best we can do right now. I must say, it might be a little bit better if everyone in the class would turn their cameras on.

I can’t imagine how frustrating it is for professors to put so much time and effort into their lessons only for it to be received by a series of silent black boxes. The lack of participation would be enough on its own -- but it’s the lack of connection that really irks me.

I get it. It is pretty weird being forced to look at your own reflection the entire time, fretting over your appearance and the fact that everyone can see your every move. Some students might not have access to a good webcam or the one they have may not work -- that, I can understand.

But if you have a fully functioning camera -- please -- just turn it on. I’ve noticed in classes where the majority of people have their cameras on it does make things much less awkward, especially for the professor.

Not only is turning your camera on beneficial to the professor but also to us. It leads to more feelings of connectedness as a group and helps to generate more group discussion. This, in turn, leads to a better understanding of the material.

And, you don’t even have to look at yourself the whole time. Zoom actually has a function that enables you to hide your video from yourself -- allowing it to still be displayed to the class. Simply right-click the video and choose “Hide Yourself” from the menu that appears.

If you’re in an environment where friends or family members may interrupt the meeting or distract you, find somewhere else you can go ahead of time; such as, a study room, your car or some other quiet place you know.

The bottom line is this -- I think the simple act of turning on your camera is a small step towards developing a sense of connection with your peers during a time when virtual interaction is our new normal. 

By Danny Holland - Danny is a senior public relations and advertising major and the Communications Intern for the Division of Student Affairs at The University of Southern Mississippi.

The Pomodoro Technique

First of all, you may be asking yourself, “Pomo-what?” Believe me. I had the same reaction the first time I heard about it.

The Pomodoro Technique is actually a pretty nifty focus tool, and I myself have used it with great success in my studies. You set a timer for a set interval of time, generally 25 minutes. You work on your projects. Once the timer is up, take a short break. Generally about 3-5 minutes long. Then you set the timer for 25 minutes and start over again.

How does it work? I think we’ve all struggled with distractions in today’s world. It’s easy to get sucked into an Internet wormhole when you have a fully-functioning computer in your pocket at all times. We may sometimes find ourselves working for hours and hours straight, yet it seems we’re hardly getting anything done. However, when you get down to it, we tend to get distracted and waste nearly half of that time, generally on our phones. The Pomodoro technique is a great solution to this common problem.

The Pomodoro Technique works by, for lack of a better word, forcing you to work during those 25 minutes. But, with the incentive of a 5 minute break at the end of that chunk of time, it makes it easy to work through. Not only this, but now you won’t have to feel guilty about looking at pictures of cute cats while you’re supposed to be working.

Here’s a fun fact: Pomodoro is actually the Italian word for tomato. The technique got its name from its creator, Francesco Cirillo, who first developed the technique as a college student in the late 80’s. What does a tomato have to do with this? He used a kitchen timer in the shape of a tomato.

Funny enough, things haven’t changed much in the past 30+ years. Most people today set their timers with an Apple. 

By Danny Holland - Danny is a senior public relations and advertising major and the Communications Intern for the Division of Student Affairs at The University of Southern Mississippi. 

Encouragement in Hard Times

Most days I feel like if I have to hear the word “unprecedented” one more time, I’ll lose it. It is obvious that our present situation is not what we would have picked for ourselves. Everyone’s lives have been uprooted to some extent and it is completely normal to feel overwhelmed during these times. I’ve often felt that way and want to share some tips from a person I look up to that help keep me grounded and remind me to remain hopeful.

Brené Brown is a national, award-winning, bestselling author and speaker who is a social worker and studies vulnerability and authenticity. I’ve found her work inspiring before COVID-19 but find myself going back to her in an effort to continue to develop what I can learn on the road to better myself. As we head into summer, there are three Brené Principles I’m following to keep learning about myself in focus, and I invite you to as well. Here we go.

Practice Grace. These are high-pressure times for everyone. Give yourself and others permission to be a little messy right now. Try to work through your own grief instead of taking it out on others. When you slip up (because we will), apologize! And be kind to yourself. I try to end every written correspondence and meeting with my staff during this time with the reminder to be kind to themselves. We often can extend grace to others but really struggle to give grace to ourselves.  

Name That Invisible Wall. It takes courage and vulnerability to be honest with yourself. These are trying times for everyone. I felt like I was rocking and rolling through the first couple of weeks but lately, it has become harder and harder to focus each week. I am at home, working remotely, with two small kids in tow and some days are just rough! Rather than sucking it up, I try to name what I’m feeling and take a break. Just walking away for a while instead of forcing myself to push through.

Believe It’s Going to be Okay. I am not saying gloss over the severity of the situation. But we will get to a place where the future gives us something to look forward to. Focus on what you can control and try to remain positive. Something I like to do when I’m feeling upset is to do something nice for someone else. It is hard to feel down when you are encouraging others. That feel good boost can be just the trick to quell uneasiness and lift your spirits!

When my kids say they can’t do something like tie their shoes or learn to ride a bike I always have them repeat back to me “I can do hard things”. It’s a little mantra with big meaning and it applies to all of us. You can do it, too. You can believe it and we can make it out of this stronger than ever.

By Emily Holmes - Emily is the Director of the Office of Leadership and Student Involvement at the University of Southern Mississippi. 

Bridging to Wellness

Working out changes the structure of your life. Think back to your childhood when you enjoyed going outside every day to ride a bike, jump rope, play tag, go swimming, or dance. I am quite sure you have some type of favorite exercise or activity. My favorite activity was jump roping. I became very skilled at it, and it’s one of many things that I still incorporate in my exercise routines.

Now for you, it may be something different. You can start with activities, locations, and times you enjoy. For example, you might like early morning walks alone on the track or in the neighborhood; others might prefer indoor or online group classes. I am a loner when it comes to exercising. I like to get in, do what I need to do, and get out.

We all know why we should exercise but maybe we don’t know-how. As a physical education major, I know it’s recommended that adults get 150 minutes of physical activity a week. But even just doing an exercise or activity you enjoy for about 10-15 minutes a day could be the first step you take to becoming active. Many things come to mind when you’re consistently working out.

During those few minutes, your mind should be thinking about how you will pass that test, graduate, be admitted to graduate school, or on any other goals that you would like to accomplish. During my first year in graduate school, I was not involved, nor did I have a graduate assistantship. Working out motivated me to become a better student. I applied for 9 graduate assistantship and was rejected by 8 of those nine. It was like telling me I am not good enough. I kept exercising to feel some type of motivation to remove those mental blocks. Soon I became a volunteer graduate assistant for the women’s basketball team which led me to another opportunity by becoming a graduate assistant for our campus recreation facility. I say that to say this; if you believe in yourself and work hard, the more likely you are to meet those goals.

Be realistic about the goals you set as you begin to start a daily exercise routine. Figure out what day or time you can exercise for a few minutes. Start slowly and work your way up to more physically challenging activities. For instance, you can begin to walk twice a day for 15 minutes. If your activity lasts at least 10 minutes, it counts as exercise... If you have the motivation to workout, you’ll likely have the motivation to do other things. Mind over matter. You can do this!

By Londyn Thomas - Londyn is a graduate student in the Physical Education program and a graduate assistant in the Division of Student Affairs at the University of Southern Mississippi. She also serves as a volunteer GA for the Southern Miss Women’s Basketball program.

Exercising to Relieve Mental Stress

You would be amazed by the things exercise does to relieve stress. Stress can come in many forms and produce many symptoms such as worrying, having anxiety, and even sensations of dread. To prevent these symptoms, I would take only a few minutes out of my day to get my body going by stretching and doing just 25 push-ups in the morning. It made my body feel better with the mindset of being ready to make the best of my day. This could help keep you focused and feeling good, too!

You might think student-athletes have it easy with nothing to stress about, but they do stress. It may come from not producing in practice or not excelling in their academics due to possibly being overwhelmed. I know this because I have been stressed as a student-athlete and as a normal student in my life. Although I have always enjoyed being in a gym, I knew working out to relieve stress was not the reason for me being there. I needed exercise separate from practice. Even playing a simple pick-up game or lifting weights created happiness for me.

Athletes and other active people I know understand this point as well. I know this because while working at the Payne Center, there would be athletes that come in for a workout or just to play a pick-up game of basketball. I am almost certain that this was a way of them relieving stress, such as doing the exercises that would benefit them mentally. 

We all have felt this way in life. For instance, you may be stressed out due to having multiple essays to do before the end of the semester. Times like this I would be in the library working for hours on assignments feeling overwhelmed. A simple walk around the library allowed my mind to block out thoughts and worries. After that walk, I was ready for the next task. And check this out, Harvard psychiatrist and researcher  John Ratey stated in an interview with inc.com, "we know from studies, when we stand our brains are a little bit better, maybe 7 percent better than when we’re sitting.” 

Exercising regularly made me happier, smarter, and most importantly less stressed. Most people do not exercise because of low energy and too much worrying over things they have no control. One thing you can often control is the way you look and how you feel. For me, looking in the mirror and seeing my big biceps and broad shoulders makes me feel great. Check out the resources from my friends at the Payne Center. I bet they’ve got something that will get you started down your path. 

By Londyn Thomas - Londyn is a graduate student in the Physical Education program and a graduate assistant in the Division of Student Affairs at the University of Southern Mississippi. She also serves as a volunteer GA for the Southern Miss Women’s Basketball program.