Encouragement in Hard Times

Most days I feel like if I have to hear the word “unprecedented” one more time, I’ll lose it. It is obvious that our present situation is not what we would have picked for ourselves. Everyone’s lives have been uprooted to some extent and it is completely normal to feel overwhelmed during these times. I’ve often felt that way and want to share some tips from a person I look up to that help keep me grounded and remind me to remain hopeful.

Brené Brown is a national, award-winning, bestselling author and speaker who is a social worker and studies vulnerability and authenticity. I’ve found her work inspiring before COVID-19 but find myself going back to her in an effort to continue to develop what I can learn on the road to better myself. As we head into summer, there are three Brené Principles I’m following to keep learning about myself in focus, and I invite you to as well. Here we go.

Practice Grace. These are high-pressure times for everyone. Give yourself and others permission to be a little messy right now. Try to work through your own grief instead of taking it out on others. When you slip up (because we will), apologize! And be kind to yourself. I try to end every written correspondence and meeting with my staff during this time with the reminder to be kind to themselves. We often can extend grace to others but really struggle to give grace to ourselves.  

Name That Invisible Wall. It takes courage and vulnerability to be honest with yourself. These are trying times for everyone. I felt like I was rocking and rolling through the first couple of weeks but lately, it has become harder and harder to focus each week. I am at home, working remotely, with two small kids in tow and some days are just rough! Rather than sucking it up, I try to name what I’m feeling and take a break. Just walking away for a while instead of forcing myself to push through.

Believe It’s Going to be Okay. I am not saying gloss over the severity of the situation. But we will get to a place where the future gives us something to look forward to. Focus on what you can control and try to remain positive. Something I like to do when I’m feeling upset is to do something nice for someone else. It is hard to feel down when you are encouraging others. That feel good boost can be just the trick to quell uneasiness and lift your spirits!

When my kids say they can’t do something like tie their shoes or learn to ride a bike I always have them repeat back to me “I can do hard things”. It’s a little mantra with big meaning and it applies to all of us. You can do it, too. You can believe it and we can make it out of this stronger than ever.

By Emily Holmes - Emily is the Director of the Office of Leadership and Student Involvement at the University of Southern Mississippi.